Introduction to the Second Edition
Dating a widower comes with challenges you probably didn’t anticipate, such as unsupportive children, untouched belongings, grief anniversaries, and holiday traditions that feel like someone else’s. At some point, questions start creeping in. Will his kids ever accept me? When will he go through his late wife’s things? Are we building something new, or am I stepping into a past life? These are the same questions I’ve heard repeatedly from thousands of women I’ve coached since publishing the first edition of this book 12 years ago.
Some of you are trying to deepen your relationship and commitment. Others are wondering if they should walk away. It often isn't easy to decide because most people around you don’t understand what you’re dealing with. As a result, you may feel incredibly isolated. That’s where this book comes in. While the first edition laid the groundwork, this expanded version goes deeper. It includes insights I’ve gained through coaching, plus new topics and tools to help you handle the emotional, practical, and relational challenges of building a life with a widower.
If you’re still in the early stages of dating, I recommend starting with my first book, Dating a Widower: Starting a Relationship with a Man Who’s Starting Over. It covers how to tell if he’s ready, what red flags to look for, and how to navigate those early grief milestones. This book picks up where that one leaves off: after you’re in an exclusive relationship and you’re starting to imagine a future together. This book will help you decide what’s working, what’s not, and whether you’re ready to move on or take the next step. You’ll also find stories from other women, practical advice, and honest answers to tough questions. All of this will help you know if your relationship is solid and give you the confidence to choose what’s right for you.
Abel Keogh
August 2025